[ Slowly, He Xuan draws his hands back, fingertips trailing across her skin as he goes. Like he's doing it entirely on purpose, to draw her in. (He is, but he'll see if she realizes or not.) ]
We'll see how that goes. [ He does give her the pipe again, though. ] Give it another shot and see.
[She doesn't realize it - not consciously, anyway - but as he draws back, she leans forward as if to follow him. It's only when he hands over the pipe that she's aware she's even moved, and she looks off to one side.
Right. Okay. Here goes nothing. She brings the pipe up to her lips.]
He'll take the hookah back as she coughs, snorting again and giving her back another pat to get the smoke out without her choking on it. It isn't lost on him that he could manage to get her to breathe it in fine with a kiss, and now this again. ]
[ Genuinely good headcanon, poor baby, time to make her full head empty. ]
Do you want to be good at it. [ Not really a genuine question, as he wonders why she would when it's not her usual vice, but still. ] What good would me telling anyone do, anyways?
[ He brings the pipe up, taking a normal drag, breathing it out afterwards rather than repeating the kiss. (Right away, anyways.) ]
Well, if it's something you enjoy doing, I'd like to be at least good enough to do it with you without coughing everywhere.
[Shi Qingxuan just says shit like that so easily. Anyway, she watches him breathe out, trying to count out the seconds between when he takes the drag and exhales the smoke. She'll get this right, darn it.]
It's not a thing I do often. [ How the fuck does she just say shit like that so easily. How do feelings work.
... but, still. He shrugs a shoulder, dismissive, as if he isn't going to answer properly. Except as he's bringing the pipe up again, he slides his eyes over to her. ]
And, well. As a general rule, she doesn't listen to anyone's orders (except her brother's, even even that is... questionable), but she listens when He Xuan tells her what to do, too. Right now, she does it without even realizing it.
She tilts her chin up, meets his eyes, and realizes about a second later that they're in just the same position they were before, except this time he's not actually touching her face.]
[ Considering that she meets his gaze like this, follows his guidance even without his touch, He Xuan has to regard her for a beat before he brings the pipe around to take a drag off of the hookah. What he's doing with his life, he doesn't know, not when he can feel those inhibitions loosened still. But if this counts as an indulgence, then, well - he'll indulge.
He'll regret this and knows it. But he's already started, and there's no stopping.
So he leans in again, going for the same kiss flavored with sweet smoke. ]
[That's a second time, now. This time, Shi Qingxuan isn't quite as surprised when he leans in.
Well - she's surprised that this is happening. They're close (or she likes to think they are), but he's never done anything like this before. Her eyes shut and she reflects on that, as their lips meet, as she parts hers, so he can pass on the smoke like before.
She breathes out the smoke, and breathes out a question - ]
[ Staying close afterwards, He Xuan turns over his answer in his head. There are any number of indulgences this could be - gluttony, lust, even greed - but he knows which one it is primarily for him, at the end of the day. Knows that this is a great deal more masochism that he's inflicting on himself, and effectively chasing, as he opens his eyes to look at her. They're dark in the dim lighting of the den, but as focused as ever.
It's cruel to her just as much as it is him, probably. There's not much he can do about that except stop. ]
Are you? [ He doesn't really dodge an answer, because that's enough of a confirmation without specifying the sin. But the pipe between them is held in a hand with a blue tattoo emblazoned on it, not any other one. ]
[She searches his face as he opens his eyes and looks back at her, and when he speaks, her gaze flicks down to the tattoo on his hand between them. Greed - she doubts it. Gluttony - honestly, with him, she can only think of it applying in the literal sense. And lust? Yeah, right. She doesn't think he's lusted after a person in his entire life, especially not her.
But it has to count for something, and she can guess what it is. She knows which sin he's aligned to, after all, and she's worried over it.
But to think that this could count as a despair indulgence for him... it makes her heart sink, just a little.
Still, if there's something he wants badly enough to have agreed to come here, and to make himself miserable over and over in pursuit of it, she'll help him. She can at least do that much, even if it hurts.
Ignoring the pipe for now, she brings both her hands up to his cheeks, then pulls him in for another kiss.]
[ She kisses him, and He Xuan isn't stupid - knows that, for as airheaded as she can be, she isn't, either - he knows that she's already figured out which indulgence this is for him. Maybe there's a twist of lust, underneath it all, of gluttony... but at the end of the day, this is all about despair for him. The miserable, masochistic part of him that still chases the complicated feelings Shi Qingxuan gives him even after reaching the end of his journey for revenge.
The pipe is set down. Truthfully, he should pull away, should put an end to it
But these feelings truly are complicated, at their simplest. Visceral, caustic, consuming at their worst. Does he want to see her suffer? Does he want to cause her pain? Does he want her to know, that this indulgence is for the one tattooed on his hand?
He doesn't know. He hates that he doesn't know.
But he does know that he returns the kiss with all the knowledge that it'll hurt her, holding her jaw with the same, tattooed hand, the other braced next to her hip as he leans into it. ]
It's not a physical pain - no, that would almost be easier. That's something that can be soothed, but there's no soothing this. There's no fixing the fact that he's someone so, so important to her - her best friend, one of the few people in the heavens that she actually feels close enough to that she can count on him for anything - and that being close to her like this apparently is enough for him to fall into despair.
You said you'd help, she tells herself, ignoring the ache in her heart that comes with not being oblivious to his pain. She doesn't know why this hurts him; she just knows that it does. Help him for once.
Her hands slide down from his cheeks to rest on his shoulders, and she parts her lips slightly, inviting him to deepen the kiss.]
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We'll see how that goes. [ He does give her the pipe again, though. ] Give it another shot and see.
1/2
Right. Okay. Here goes nothing. She brings the pipe up to her lips.]
2/2
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Oh, goodbye.
He'll take the hookah back as she coughs, snorting again and giving her back another pat to get the smoke out without her choking on it. It isn't lost on him that he could manage to get her to breathe it in fine with a kiss, and now this again. ]
no subject
She makes a face as he pats her back.]
I'm not very good at this... [She's. Sulking a little.] Don't tell anyone, okay?
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Do you want to be good at it. [ Not really a genuine question, as he wonders why she would when it's not her usual vice, but still. ] What good would me telling anyone do, anyways?
[ He brings the pipe up, taking a normal drag, breathing it out afterwards rather than repeating the kiss. (Right away, anyways.) ]
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[Shi Qingxuan just says shit like that so easily. Anyway, she watches him breathe out, trying to count out the seconds between when he takes the drag and exhales the smoke. She'll get this right, darn it.]
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... but, still. He shrugs a shoulder, dismissive, as if he isn't going to answer properly. Except as he's bringing the pipe up again, he slides his eyes over to her. ]
Chin up.
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And, well. As a general rule, she doesn't listen to anyone's orders (except her brother's, even even that is... questionable), but she listens when He Xuan tells her what to do, too. Right now, she does it without even realizing it.
She tilts her chin up, meets his eyes, and realizes about a second later that they're in just the same position they were before, except this time he's not actually touching her face.]
no subject
He'll regret this and knows it. But he's already started, and there's no stopping.
So he leans in again, going for the same kiss flavored with sweet smoke. ]
no subject
Well - she's surprised that this is happening. They're close (or she likes to think they are), but he's never done anything like this before. Her eyes shut and she reflects on that, as their lips meet, as she parts hers, so he can pass on the smoke like before.
She breathes out the smoke, and breathes out a question - ]
...you're indulging?
[Because... what else could it be?]
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It's cruel to her just as much as it is him, probably. There's not much he can do about that except stop. ]
Are you? [ He doesn't really dodge an answer, because that's enough of a confirmation without specifying the sin. But the pipe between them is held in a hand with a blue tattoo emblazoned on it, not any other one. ]
no subject
But it has to count for something, and she can guess what it is. She knows which sin he's aligned to, after all, and she's worried over it.
But to think that this could count as a despair indulgence for him... it makes her heart sink, just a little.
Still, if there's something he wants badly enough to have agreed to come here, and to make himself miserable over and over in pursuit of it, she'll help him. She can at least do that much, even if it hurts.
Ignoring the pipe for now, she brings both her hands up to his cheeks, then pulls him in for another kiss.]
no subject
The pipe is set down. Truthfully, he should pull away, should put an end to it
But these feelings truly are complicated, at their simplest. Visceral, caustic, consuming at their worst. Does he want to see her suffer? Does he want to cause her pain? Does he want her to know, that this indulgence is for the one tattooed on his hand?
He doesn't know. He hates that he doesn't know.
But he does know that he returns the kiss with all the knowledge that it'll hurt her, holding her jaw with the same, tattooed hand, the other braced next to her hip as he leans into it. ]
no subject
It's not a physical pain - no, that would almost be easier. That's something that can be soothed, but there's no soothing this. There's no fixing the fact that he's someone so, so important to her - her best friend, one of the few people in the heavens that she actually feels close enough to that she can count on him for anything - and that being close to her like this apparently is enough for him to fall into despair.
You said you'd help, she tells herself, ignoring the ache in her heart that comes with not being oblivious to his pain. She doesn't know why this hurts him; she just knows that it does. Help him for once.
Her hands slide down from his cheeks to rest on his shoulders, and she parts her lips slightly, inviting him to deepen the kiss.]