[ Considering he hasn't been a child for 540-some years, or around one in as long, the rational escapes him until Mineo. Explains? It still doesn't make much sense to him, because Mineo is in fact a fucking nerd.
But. ]
That's usually a platitude more than anything substantial, you know. But I suppose you're willing to take responsibility like that?
[ . . . . oh no there's going to be a very sincere answer coming. maybe it's just because it's romcom night? (it's not just because it's romcom night.)]
.... yeah. When you're hurting, and someone shows that they care about you.... however that comes - I think that can be really healing. Nothing's really enough to be able to erase loss - you'll always carry it with you...
[ . . . ]
But having someone to share the weight, and say that your suffering matters to them because they care about you.... If that sort of affection comes in a kiss, then isn't that healing in its own way?
Honestly, he immediately knows it's not because it's romcom night. Did we mention this is exhausting? It's exhausting. ]
I suppose that's... one way of looking at things. [ Truthfully, he really is too jaded to wholly believe in this. But a nearly-dead, shriveled part of him probably still does. ] You are right, though - nothing erases loss. It's not exactly something I think about ever sharing, especially in such a romanticized way, though I can't deny that maybe that works for other people.
[ Despite saying he understood Mineo when he was being bullied about wanting love to matter. shh it's fine ]
[LOVE MATTERS!!! Mineo deflates - but only a little. like he knows that he probably comes off as someone naive but... he's stubborn about it. he's stubborn about how much he wants affection and love to matters.]
Ahah....
I guess it's just... a sentiment that I don't want to leave people alone, no matter the loss they've faced. I don't think you can ever truly replace what you love... but as long as you're alive, isn't there still room to love even more?
[ Love mattered, once. Things are... complicated, for Ming Yi, and that also is somewhat broached when Mineo asks that question. ]
... I have a harder time rationalizing it in the same way, I guess. [ At least towards himself. (Especially towards himself.) ] But I can still understand. You are someone that has suffered loss, so you know what it feels like, and would rather not see others in that same pain.
[ . . . well. he just manages a little nod of acknowledgement at that but also - ]
.... I don't think you have to force yourself, Yi-kun. Not after what you've been through, or anything. You know what you need best, probably.
[ . . . a 'but' lingers. like there's something else he's clearly trying to decide if he wants to say.... and at the end of the day, mineo is someone who cares far too much and speaks too freely to keep it inside.]
.... I just hope you find happiness, whatever that looks like. Love or otherwise. I really want you to be happy, you know? Even if it's an uphill battle - I think it's worth it.
[ There's a - beat, while he processes this. It's been a very, very long time since someone cared about his happiness, barring Qingxuan and the complicated story there. And, truthfully? Ming Yi doesn't quite know what to do with that. This person who has only known him for three weeks, now on their fourth, is so sincere with his words.
He does care too much. But he's seen one of the lowest points of his life, and has matched it with his own loss, his own desire to avenge a treasured person, and this is how he responds to it.
With a slow, almost resigned sigh, he grabs the popcorn bag out of the microwave, batting the door so that it closes and depositing the bag on the counter. ]
Maybe after all of this. Who knows. You all are exhausting on a regular basis, and nevermind the murders, but maybe it isn't all bad.
[isn't it a terrible thing, to have someone so suddenly and ardently in your corner?
(Mineo doesn't think so. maybe it's because he wishes that it's what someone offered to him, back when those things still mattered.)
but he turns his head to the popcorn - only briefly, before he looks back to Ming Yi and can't help a grin, easygoing and earnest.]
Yeah? You think so? [what a tsundere, but mineo just manages it with total sincerity as he says - ] Then if there's something I could do to make things a little better for you, I'm glad to do it.
Even if it's just a pocket of happiness here and there, I'll do my best.
Stop making me watch these movies, for starters. [ Dryly, to try and escape the sincerity a little bit. But he's still turning it over in his head, having not forgotten what he saw from Mineo's memory, either. He looks down at the popcorn for a beat, then back to Mineo himself. ]
They're obnoxious. [ And so is Mineo. Hell, now he has two dense, sincere people projecting support and care at him.
Except he also likes Mineo, and it's been a horrifying thing to come to realize, considering - well, everything. Hm. ]
I'll take that as a no. Maybe, after learning that you've experienced loss like mine, I think you deserve this - without being stabbed.
[ Ming Yi takes two fingers, using them to tip Mineo's chin up - and just like that, bypasses his forehead to press a proper kiss to his lips. Gluttons go big or go home. ]
[but he's pliable enough - for someone who's pretty stubborn, he's actually not hard to lead around, and it's probably because his brain hasn't caught up with reality when he lets his chin get tilted up and then.
[ Ming Yi pulls back not long after initiating, because Mineo.exe has stopped working, as he expected from Molly giving him that kiss last week. He'll use this moment to pick up and shake his popcorn bag a bit, leaning back against the counter.
And then when Mineo's back in working order, he snorts. It isn't as big of a production as the time that Mineo got him to laugh, but it's still there - an uptick at the corners of his mouth. ]
[THIS IS TOTALLY BULLY HOURS but the idea of more kisses at all just manages to make Mineo flush worse?! PLEASE, HE'S JUST A LITTLE LOSER WHO'S WAY OUT OF HIS DEPTH.
His hand comes up to touch his mouth almost in confusion - did that really happen - before he catches himself and flushes worse and looks away.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[he didn't think much of it!! fucking nerd. but he does offer a little bit of a smile]
I used to do that with my family, I guess? You know, if you get hurt somewhere, then kissing it better is a solution.
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But. ]
That's usually a platitude more than anything substantial, you know. But I suppose you're willing to take responsibility like that?
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Take responsibility?
[what does this mean]
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[ you'll see, nerdlord ]
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Depends...? I mean - it's just easier with friends... and it's not like a kiss solves a stab wound...
[a beat]
But if I got a kiss from someone after getting stabbed, I'd probably feel a lot better?!
[DON'T JUST SHARE YOUR INNER MONOLOGUE YOU LOSER]
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I'm not going to say this more than once, but let's avoid you being stabbed?
[ why are you fucking LIKE THIS ]
Does that count for emotional pains, as well?
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... maybe...? I feel like...
[ . . . . oh no there's going to be a very sincere answer coming. maybe it's just because it's romcom night? (it's not just because it's romcom night.)]
.... yeah. When you're hurting, and someone shows that they care about you.... however that comes - I think that can be really healing. Nothing's really enough to be able to erase loss - you'll always carry it with you...
[ . . . ]
But having someone to share the weight, and say that your suffering matters to them because they care about you.... If that sort of affection comes in a kiss, then isn't that healing in its own way?
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Honestly, he immediately knows it's not because it's romcom night. Did we mention this is exhausting? It's exhausting. ]
I suppose that's... one way of looking at things. [ Truthfully, he really is too jaded to wholly believe in this. But a nearly-dead, shriveled part of him probably still does. ] You are right, though - nothing erases loss. It's not exactly something I think about ever sharing, especially in such a romanticized way, though I can't deny that maybe that works for other people.
[ Despite saying he understood Mineo when he was being bullied about wanting love to matter. shh it's fine ]
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Ahah....
I guess it's just... a sentiment that I don't want to leave people alone, no matter the loss they've faced. I don't think you can ever truly replace what you love... but as long as you're alive, isn't there still room to love even more?
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... I have a harder time rationalizing it in the same way, I guess. [ At least towards himself. (Especially towards himself.) ] But I can still understand. You are someone that has suffered loss, so you know what it feels like, and would rather not see others in that same pain.
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.... I don't think you have to force yourself, Yi-kun. Not after what you've been through, or anything. You know what you need best, probably.
[ . . . a 'but' lingers. like there's something else he's clearly trying to decide if he wants to say.... and at the end of the day, mineo is someone who cares far too much and speaks too freely to keep it inside.]
.... I just hope you find happiness, whatever that looks like. Love or otherwise. I really want you to be happy, you know? Even if it's an uphill battle - I think it's worth it.
[I think your happiness is worth it.]
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He does care too much. But he's seen one of the lowest points of his life, and has matched it with his own loss, his own desire to avenge a treasured person, and this is how he responds to it.
With a slow, almost resigned sigh, he grabs the popcorn bag out of the microwave, batting the door so that it closes and depositing the bag on the counter. ]
Maybe after all of this. Who knows. You all are exhausting on a regular basis, and nevermind the murders, but maybe it isn't all bad.
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(Mineo doesn't think so. maybe it's because he wishes that it's what someone offered to him, back when those things still mattered.)
but he turns his head to the popcorn - only briefly, before he looks back to Ming Yi and can't help a grin, easygoing and earnest.]
Yeah? You think so? [what a tsundere, but mineo just manages it with total sincerity as he says - ] Then if there's something I could do to make things a little better for you, I'm glad to do it.
Even if it's just a pocket of happiness here and there, I'll do my best.
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Stop making me watch these movies, for starters. [ Dryly, to try and escape the sincerity a little bit. But he's still turning it over in his head, having not forgotten what he saw from Mineo's memory, either. He looks down at the popcorn for a beat, then back to Mineo himself. ]
And is someone doing the same for you?
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[no.
but mineo pauses at that, a little confused at the question.]
... doing... what?
[that's also a no.]
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Except he also likes Mineo, and it's been a horrifying thing to come to realize, considering - well, everything. Hm. ]
I'll take that as a no. Maybe, after learning that you've experienced loss like mine, I think you deserve this - without being stabbed.
[ Ming Yi takes two fingers, using them to tip Mineo's chin up - and just like that, bypasses his forehead to press a proper kiss to his lips. Gluttons go big or go home. ]
[1/4]
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oh.
oh?]
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is he breathing?]
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H-Ha?!
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And then when Mineo's back in working order, he snorts. It isn't as big of a production as the time that Mineo got him to laugh, but it's still there - an uptick at the corners of his mouth. ]
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THIS IS TERRIBLE HE'S SO EMBARRASSED BUT MING YI LOOKS HAPPY SO IT'S NOT LIKE HE REALLY HAS ANY ROOM TO COMPLAIN AT ALL]
Y-Yi-kun.....! What was that about.....?!
[HE'S SO FLUSTERED OOHHHHH]
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[ HE'S TERRIBLE. It's bully hours, but unfortunately this is out of fondness, so here we are.
Yeah maybe he cares about you or something, Mineo, what about it. ]
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His hand comes up to touch his mouth almost in confusion - did that really happen - before he catches himself and flushes worse and looks away.]
I... Uh....!
[wow so articulate]
...... I won't....
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Try thinking really hard about what you literally just got done telling me, Mineo, and go start the movies.
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